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Stop People Pleasing


Nov 17, 2020

This episode gives you two ways to not only spot a narcissist, but deal with them.  Let's go beyond the quick descriptions such as 'grandiose' and 'belittles others' to a really useful filter to get past the excuses that  you as an empath or HSP have made for these people before.

What Is A Narcissist?

We are going to keep the definition to the very short ‘self-absorption’ for this episode, because this topic is so complex. What seems at first glance to be synonymous with the personality of the 45th president of The United States is actually a multi-faceted concept. You would never call Donald Trump vulnerable, yet there is such a thing as a vulnerable narcissist for example.

 

Recognising A Narcissist Strategy #1

Become Aware of Narcissist PR

PR stands for public relations, and is a perfectly ethical part of any business marketing strategy. What is not ethical, however, is PR that is out of alignment with the way that the company operates. Think of an environmentally irresponsible firm that funds an orphanage in the area that it is stripping bare, merely as an exercise in damage limitation.

What is the narcissist equivalent? Passive aggression, manipulation, put downs – any attempt to elevate their sense of self at your expense. This is then followed by an equally strategic show of gratitude, praise, selflessness and so on – but minus an apology.

It is the lack of contrition, of vulnerability that shows you that this is PR and not a genuine apology.

Another sign of PR – a return to the first stage of manipulation and put downs.

Recognising narcissist PR for what it  is is not a panacea – but you get better laying the foundations for boundary setting.

 

Spotting A Narcissist Technique #2 

The 10-Minute Rule

This is an excellent filter to save yourself a  LOT of future energy drain and stress. Nip any unwanted connections with strangers in the bud within 10 minutes.

 

Resources

The Empath Phrasebook – Lifesaver 10 is at

https://www.theshiftinside.com/lifesaver/

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